Not Sure What This Is But I Like It

Genpets

'Vulcan Death Grip' Kellogg's Ad

Not a client known for outstanding commercials. Until this one.

Early Start

Went to a meeting at 8.30am this morning. It was very interesting.. but definitely felt a little early. Aside from shoots, it's the earliest I've ever got up to go to work. What's the earliest time that a meeting can legally be arranged for? Is 8.30 acceptable? Or should it be 9? 10 even?

Another Offender

The general public think that advertising is deceitful nonsense. But can they do any better? No. This London shop owner can't even get a simple open/closed sign right. He's left it on 'open'... and padlocked the door.

Unsubtle Advertising

You're going to die. So you better go to church and make things right. Sign next to Camber church, Camber Sands, Kent.

Office Toys

Office toys have been around forever. Recently, grown men have started placing dolls in their offices. These are often Star Wars figures, or oddball pieces like the Kubrick collection. And I am no exception. My wife bought me a Sigmund Freud action figure, and he has gone proudly on display in my new office. Account teams come in with problems, Sigmund lies there in his blister-pack, listening. He's an excellent listener.

What Should A Creative's Workspace Look Like?

Messy?

Or tidy?

They're normally messy. Which means "Hey, I'm a creative, not some anal-retentive accountant-type like those account handler persons, OK?"

Mine is tidy. At my last company, a lot of people were freaked out by that. But at this company, it's OK. They like tidy.

In my view, what your workspace looks like shouldn't matter. Just the work.

It's Here!

The first Christmas brief of the year, that is. I'm not complaining though. Could be nice. A christmas ad for one of our biggest clients. Anyone else got a christmas brief yet?

First Day In My New Job

Here's the view from my office window. Carnaby Street. Not a bad location.

Centre Point.

The Post Office Tower.

A bottle of wine I drank the night before. Thought it would be a good omen.

More tomorrow on how weird everything is.

Ballooning

So the leaving-do was a lot of fun. Mostly because people were inhaling laughing gas. I kid you not. Here are some photos.

Apparently it's the latest craze. You use a canister like this, that you can buy on the internet.

The cartridges that you put in it contain nitrous oxide. They are designed for making whipped cream.

The spent cartridges 'spling' out like shotgun shells.

It's completely legal. Apparently the high lasts about a minute, but I didn't try it because I'm a pussy.

Leaving Update

Computer: I've gone for a Powerbook. Apparently there's no right-click... this is worrying...

Leaving-do: We've gone for the medium-sized pub which is a medium-distance away from the agency. If anyone wants to come, you're very welcome, it's this Thursday at the Windsor Castle, Campden Hill Road, near Notting Hill Gate, London. From lunchtime onwards. The agency is contributing £300 for drinks so if you get there early you can drink for free.

False Advertising

I walk past this cafe every day. The sign proudly proclaims 'Cafe Open'... but that sign is painted and non-removable. In other words, this naughty cafe is claiming to be open 24 hours a day 365 days a year, when in fact it's rather lazy and they often shut up shop at about 5pm. I can't see how I could ever bring myself to have a coffee there. Bunch of liars.

PC or Mac?

Just got a call from the agency we're joining. Do we want to have a PC or a Mac?

I'm stumped. Obviously Mac is cooler. On the downside, I don't know how to use it. And I have a PC at home. Not sure if that would create a problem or not... anyone know?

Leaving-Do Time

So where do you hold the leaving-do? Here's the options, and what I think they mean.

THE CRAPPY OLD PUB THAT'S RIGHT ACROSS THE ROAD FROM THE AGENCY: "We're old-school."

THE TRENDY WINE BAR THAT JUST OPENED IN THE NEW SHOPPING CENTRE: "We're new-school."

THE VERY SMALL PUB UP THE ROAD: "We're worried we don't have many friends."

THE OUT-OF-THE ORDINARY OPTION LIKE HIRING A BOAT OR A CLUB OR SOMETHING: "Oh, they're so creative."

NO LEAVING-DO AT ALL: "Extremely worried about lack of friends."

JUST A LUNCH: "Maybe people will come if it's just a lunch."

Biggest Ever Product Shot Competition

Well, here's my entry. How on earth did the account team manage to sell this one? (Taken outside Paddington Station, London)

Response To Andrew

Andrew said...
Good luck to both of you. What are the things a creative wants to know about their new office by the way?
4:58 AM

1. Where is my chair
2. Coffee machine, toilet
3. My computer isn't working. what's the number for I.T.?
4. What can we put in to block out the glass wall so i can pick my nose in peace?
5.What time does everyone arrive and leave? Need to arrive 10 minutes earlier and leave 10 minutes later than the convention. Well, for the first month at least.
6. Where the hell is that guy from I.T.?
7. Where is nearest Pret A Manger
8. Nothing. Don't care at all (this contribution from my partner)
9. Where are the lined pads? And a pen?
10. OK, so let me speak to the head of I.T.

So Vain

Had my photo in Campaign last week, in connection with our move. Sadly, I looked as friendly as the average serial killer. Nevertheless, getting your photo in Campaign is a must for the ego-driven-monster types like me who work in advertising.

My pet hate is when a creative team moves and Campaign publishes a photo of... the creative directors who hired them.

<-----This is a particularly bad example from a few months ago. The guys in the pic are not poor old Chiappe and Saunby, but the TBWA CD's (now ex CD's) Brooke-Taylor and McTear.

Resignation Letter

Our creative department has a little tradition of witty resignation letters.

The CD puts them up on his wall.

No pressure.

So I turn to the web. Of course, there's a website now called i-resign.com

Nothing good there though.

<----This was Nixon's.

In the end, ours just said "Yes, we're whores."

I Resign

Yes, my partner and I are making a huge leap - from one multinational ad agency with three letters in its name to another multinational ad agency with three letters in its name.

Our creative director was kind enough to ask if there was anything he could do to make us stay, but there wasn't really. It's been 7 years. Seven happy years. But it was just time for new challenges.

So perhaps over the next few days I will be blogging about what it's like to leave somewhere and start anew...

You Know You're A Creative When...

1. You have no idea where everyone else in the agency sits
2. You don't know how to use the internet (except me and Copyranter. where the hell is everyone else?)
3. You have no idea how to book a taxi. Or a bike. In fact you are paralysed without a TV producer to plan your every movement and gesture
4. You constantly have to listen to people who have never had an idea in their lives criticise your ideas
5. The account handler asks you to change your script so the client will like it more, the planner asks you to change your script so consumers will like it more, the creative director asks you to change your script so awards juries will like it more. And the client asks you to change your script so it has a longer product sequence at the end. And in the middle. And the beginning. Actually, can we just have the product all the way through. Big. Put a spotlight on it. Some highlights. In fact, why don't we just make it dance? What do you mean yoghurts can't dance?

Dr Oetker You Are A Fraud, Sir!

This is a frozen pizza from the Dr Oetker 'Bistro' range.

The TV ad, which I've put a link to here, concerns a couple who wave away a beret-clad accordion player from their table, on the grounds that their frozen pizza is already French enough.

It includes lines such as "served on a typical French baguette", "so very French", and "Bistro is French enough for me".

Guess what? A super then comes up which says "Made in Germany."

I would have simply sent the brief back.

It's Bad Ad Time Again

An ad is supposed to persuade. Get you nodding along in agreement. With insights that chime, because they're true.

There's not much point constructing an argument out of things that aren't true and which nobody agrees with.

"So much for British generosity." What? Whoever said the British were generous? There are a lot of things commonly said about the British. I've never heard 'generous'.

"They've given us a sport nobody understands." You mean the most popular sport in India, right?

"Trains that don't run." Of course! The famous Indian trains that don't run. Not the ones I've seen running - indeed packed - in tons of films and TV programmes.

Nice Bus

Here's a fun bus-side I saw in San Francisco.

Incidentally, the bus is actually two buses joined by a bendy bit in the middle - which makes it even more appropriate.

Impressions of the U.S.

Couldn't blog much from the U.S. because United sent my luggage to Tokyo so I couldn't use my laptop.

But now that I'm back, here's a few thoughts on differences between the US and UK ad scenes. Feel free to add your own.

1. Interactive advertising is huge over there. It grew 38% year on year. Seems to be second only to TV in importance to agencies now. We are way behind in the UK but it can only go the same way.

2. They don't have separate interactive creatives. Makes sense. I mean, we don't have separate creatives doing posters, for example.

3. All the creatives over there use a Mac for their print layouts. There are no 'scamps'. Not a layout pad to be found. This surely is a mistake. It means creatives are spending time on making something look good, time which they could use to have better ideas. And secondly, when something is presented to the client already 'finished...' it leaves less room for the photographer or illustrator to add their input.

4. The Top 20 UK agencies are all in London. So if you move agencies, you don't have to move house. But of the top 20 US agencies, quite a few are in New York, but others are spread around in LA, San Fancisco, Miami, Chicago, Minneapolis, Portland etc. So getting a new job most likely means uprooting yourself (and your family if you have one). Despite this, people in the U.S. move jobs a lot more often!!

5. A lot of creatives work on just one account. The reason is obvious - accounts over there are huge. But is it a good thing? On the plus side, you'll get to know that business well. But on the downside, I worry it could get dull...

Lots Of TV Ads Here

Well, that's my first and totally unoriginal observation about US TV advertising. There's rather a lot of it. And it cuts straight into the programmes. No little pause or flash-frame ident. Straight in. Each ad follows straight into the next one too. Again, no pause. It's an all-out assault of Saving Private Ryan proportions. But I suppose you get used to it.

And the quality? Generally very low. If you think about it, the UK and the US tend to do roughly equally well at award shows around the world. But the US produces about eight times as much advertising. So that means the average quality is...

A lot of the low quality I think is a product of the advertiser trying to say too much. Each ad is trying to put across a brand message and several product messages at the same time, and then finish with a 'deal' or special offer at the end.

Simple stuff like the Mac ads (latest one above) stand out a mile.

England Is Siberia

Love this Lynx/Axe ad with Ben Affleck. Saw it again on TV here in LA last night.

Except it didn't have Ben Affleck in it.

That's right. A different guy. They obviously filmed the whole thing twice, shot-for-shot, with a different actor.

I can just imagine the conversation between Ben and his agent.

AGENT: "Ben, they want you to do a commercial for Axe. It's two million dollars."

BEN: "Nah, I don't want to do commercials."

AGENT: "It's international only. So it won't be seen by anyone who matters. It will only air in places like, you know, England."

BEN: "Oh, okay. Fine."

Scamp Is Off To California Tomorrow

It's partly a family holiday, but I'm also having a couple of interviews - one in L.A. and one in San Francisco.

If anyone has worked in both the U.S. and the U.K., I'd love to know how agency life compares.

What makes a good CD?

Hi everyone. Today I'm turning my blog over to "Guest Suit." This person is an Account Handler of my acquaintance, who is going to give us a POV from behind enemy lines, every now and then.

Please feel free to post any abuse or questions.

GUEST SUIT WRITES: So, Steve Henry started at TBWA last week, as the new executive creative director. The hiring has been universally praised. The sentiment is that he may well be capable of filling the shoes of ad land’s most high-profile creative, Trevor Beattie. But why? What is it that makes a great creative director?

Before I begin, I want to tell a story about how one of the top consultants (consultants: AAR and the like), once told me that, when it comes to new business, really the CD is the star of the show. That wherever clients go, they’ll meet charming and charismatic account men, and clever planners, but it’s the CD that sets the distinct impression of an agency. They’re the ‘X-Factor’.

So, what divides the good from the great, I think, is this:

1. They should be high profile – both to attract attention, and so that their POV holds weight;
2. They should have a strong and (ideally) profound point of view;
3. They should have stage-presence – an ability to command the attention of a roomful of people with their conviction and confidence.
4. They should have the respect of both creatives and account teams.
5. They should know when the brief’s wrong but an idea’s right.

So that’s what makes a good CD according to an Account Man. And why’s an account man’s opinion important? Well, let’s not forget who actually hires these CD’s...

OTS Is A Lie

Rob over at The Ad-Pit mentions how annoyed he is by the Vauxhall adverts. You know, the ones with the kids behaving like adults.

As he says, the ads are actually quite good. But they have been aired so much, they are now irritating.

I totally agree. Those ads are irritating.

Surely this OTS (Opportunities To See) statistic that media people talk about is wack?

They normally tell you that the OTS for an ad is 3.4 or something. Yet although I don't watch much TV, I seem to see every single ad about 100 times...

You're Fired!

J****, an account director at our agency, was in a meeting last week when the client nipped out and called our agency's chairman to say: "I want this guy off my business. Today."

The chairman sent his PA into that meeting and pulled the account director out, and then fired him.

Within 10 minutes of the client's call, J**** had left the building.

To think I joined this business 'cos I heard it was fun...

Blogclash

I've promised Russell Davies that me and my creative buddies are going to whip the world's planners into shape.

The topic is simple: "Six Things Planners Need To Know About Creatives".

(If you're a planner, then by all means contribute to "Six Things Creatives Need To Know About Planners" over on Russell's blog.)

Breakfast With Blogmeister

Had breakfast this morning with blog guru, genius planner and (as it turns out) extremely down-to-earth nice guy Rusell Davies.

As many of you will know, Russell has a keen interest in egg, bacon, chips and beans. I hope he liked the fare at Raffles.

The idea was to plan a 'Blogclash', a mooted joint-hosting in which planners and creatives would joust across the blogosphere.

But Russell has enough ideas to fill 100 hours (or indeed 100 posts), so we got pleasantly distracted and didn't get around to cracking the format for this blogclash. I suspect this is partly also because I am bursting with a Larry David-esque exasperation about planning, and Russell is just a lot more laidback and doesn't feel at all vitriolic towards creatives.

His theory is that creatives suffer so much rejection on a daily basis, they need to take it out on someone and that someone tends to be planners! Very neat. Give me a few days, I will think of a snappy come-back.

Cool Ad, Cool Placement

I love this spoof teleshopping ad, by Mother for Amnesty International, which supposedly advertises AK-47's.

And where did I see it? Sitting at home, before Lord Of War on DVD.

(Trivia: Lord Of War director Andrew Niccol, who also wrote The Truman Show and Gattaca, is a former creative at BBDO London).

So It's All Over

Well, England's participation is. And yet the advertising goes on. I've never quite managed to make my mind up about the Budweiser World Cup idents.

The EDF ones are clearly shit, but some of the Bud ones are okay, despite the central flaw in their "You do the football, we'll do the beer premise." After all, if they're not into football, why are they sponsoring it?

(Incidentally, the ad above is a spoof... here are the real ones.)

Wrongest Jury Verdict Since O.J.

The ad on the left won a Grand Prix at Cannes this year.

In the 'Outdoor' category!

What really annoys me is I can hear the jury saying "Hey people, look at this, we just gave the Grand Prix to a poster that has 500 words on it! Isn't that just so totally crazy of us?!"

But it's a poor ad. Not a genuine poster. Not a genuine insight about how people look at art. Poorly written. And ugly.

Apart from that, dear reader, I loved it...

More Cannes

Cannes

New Volkswagen Ad

Is it any good? I'm not sure.

Out Of The Mouths Of Babes

How can supposedly intelligent ad agency employees make an ad which is so lame, even a 3 year old thinks it's stupid?

My daughter's verdict on this ad was a simple "Cars don't go in the water, Daddy. They only go on the road."

What's yours?

It's Happened

In a previous post I wondered which advertiser would be the first to jump on the Peter Crouch 'robot' goal celebration. Now we have the answer. It's Citroen. A crappy ad but I still love the track.

Shock Horror - Marketing Actually Works

Shortly after writing a post called Advertising Works - Unfortunately I have recently come to another blinding realisation. Marketing works too.

You see, we used to give my 3 year old daughter yoghurt. Then she decided she didn't like it. Then we discovered a product called Frubes. She loves it. And what are Frubes? That's right. Yoghurt in a tube.

All they changed was the name, and the packaging... and it worked.

(P.S. it didn't hurt that she saw TV ads featuring some amusing Frubes characters who get their heads ripped off and their insides sucked out).

Possibly The World's Most Unoriginal Topic - Originality

There's a beautiful ad for Ariston washing machines over at AdBlather. But on texturl.net Brandon Barr points out its close similarity to a campaign for Ecover washing detergent.

Today's Campaign magazine carries a letter pointing out the similarity of the new NSPCC ad to one for T-Mobile, an article describing similarities between a Daily Telegraph and an Observer Sport Monthly campaign, and a whole slew of opinions on that hoary old topic of plagiarism.

For what it's worth, here's mine.

The commandment says "thou shalt not steal" not "thou shalt not steal an idea", so as far as I'm concerned, there's no moral law against it.

But our task is to sell. And if an idea doesn't feel original, it won't be as impactful.

What do you think?

Candid

Great post over at The Ad Pit featuring this wonderfully candid piece of communication.

It's a great achievement for a product recall ad to actually make me feel warmer towards a brand.

Why can't all our ads be this honest?

What Is CHI's Secret?

The front page of this week's Campaign magazine announces: "Britvic shifts £.2.5m J2O [an orange juice brand] from BBH to CHI."

CHI wins yet another account. Not big news really. They've gone from start-up to top ten agency in about five years.

But what amazed me was what the story revealed further down.

"Britvic's still-drinks business saw growth of 9 per cent. This was driven by strong sales of... J2O" meanwhile "Britvic reports a 9 per cent slump in sales of its carbonated drinks" many of which (e.g. Tango) are handled by... CHI.

So the agency that was doing well lost the account... to the agency that was doing badly.

Unbelievable.

Until you consider CHI's secret weapon. Johnny Hornby. (That's him in the picture).

To say he's quite an impressive account man would be like saying Brazil are not bad at football.

I've met him a few times. I don't know how he does it, but when he's talking to you... it's like the sun's shining. Clients give him their business because they just want to be around him.

Anyone else have ideas on what makes a good account man?

Irrelevant Football

Every brand is looking to exploit World Cup fever at the moment. And a lot of them are doing it extremely badly.

For example, in the current Morrisons TV advertising, a football bursts through the screen at the end... with absolutely no relevance to the preceding 2 for 1 offer on sausages whatsoever.

If you like the idea of an irrelevant football bursting through the screen, you can see one here on the Morrisons website.

Any other examples of irrelevant football?

New Citroen Robot Ad

Even better than the last one, I think. The animation is great, and the track is a belter.

Planners Who Blog

That's right, folks. Planners don't just ramble, make interesting charts with triangles and oblongs on, and feed biscuits to housewives in return for their fascinating views on washing powder.

They also blog.

Two excellent planning blogs I have found recently areRussell Davies and Northern Planner.

Highly recommended, whatever side of the fence you're on.

In Recovery

No post yesterday, as I was out all afternoon at Maze, Gordon Ramsey's latest restaurant.

Still recovering today.

Not that I'm ungrateful... but why do people in our industry have to celebrate finishing a job by going on a massive bender?

I'm Impressed

The new campaign for Birds Eye foods, from BBH, is brilliant. The campaign is attempting - I believe successfully - nothing less than a complete re-framing of the public's attitude towards frozen food.

The gist of it is that far from being unhealthy and full of preservatives, frozen foods are actually healthier than fresh foods, because they come to you naturally preserved, rather than deteriorating over a period of days before they reach you, like 'fresh' food.

A campaign like this, which can change the eating habits of a nation, in the service of creating greater sales for a brand, is basically... the holy grail.

Robocrouch

Yes, the robot dance is sweeping the nation.

(Note to international readers: England striker Peter Crouch celebrated a goal against Hungary with some fine robotic dancing)

Fans of the consumer-generated content thing may be interested to note that there are over 2,300 mash-up versions of Crouch's dance on YouTube.

Given the instant fame and popularity that Crouch's moves have generated, it's only a matter of time before an advertiser jumps on his little wagon.

Who will be the first?

My bet is Nike, simply because one of their agencies in the UK is Nitrosoul. And the creative director of Nitrosoul is... Peter Crouch's dad, Bruce.

Or perhaps, Lynx - "Can't dance? Lynx"

Any others?

JWT Makes Good Ad

Great new Kit Kat ad. Footage from the 1966 World Cup Final is shown, with Geoff Hurst's infamous 3rd goal which strikes the crossbar, and as England celebrate, Germany are contesting the goal, so the referee goes to the Russian linesman and instead of following the action he is eating a Kit Kat and hasn't seen the controversy. Flustered, he gives England the goal. Then the tagline comes up: "Have a break, have a Kit Kat."

The idea is great, and the execution is brilliant.

What more could you want? Here's the ad, courtesy of fellow Brit ad blogger FishNChimps. Congrats to creative team Colin Jones & Michael Campbell, and director Chris Palmer.