Thursday, July 19, 2007

Scamp's Couch

Today I received this e-mail:

Yo Uncle Simon. I have a question for you: We have the worst client here ever! He won't even listen and eats up a constant conveyor belt of Account people. What should I do when I really want a client to get a fucking grip and stop being an arsehole? What I really mean I guess is, how far can one push it? Do you have any advice? You can stick this on Scamp if you want, but don't mention my name! Yours, Mr Angry/ Mr Coward.

My answer was this:

Being rude or angry to clients doesn't work - they just get defensive. The only way to get them to "get a fucking grip" by which I assume you mean "buy your work" is to explain, explain, explain. Explain your idea a thousand different ways. Get reference. Lots of reference. Make them see it. Show it in situ. Show them what their consumers are really like. That kind of thing. All the best.

Any better suggestions?


Anonymous said...

Most clients are people who got fired from agencies. That's why they're shit. And why they secretly hate agencies.

Anonymous said...

I would add-

Aways deal with the top client.

Most Junior clients are risk adverse. They don't want to loose their jobs. What they don't kill off could be killed off by later by the top cheese, so save yourself some pain and go straight to the person who makes the ultimate decision.

George Parker said...

The best client I ever had let me do anything I wanted. I used to shoot amazing, big budget TV spots all over the world. Then he stole $100 million from the company and is about to go to jail for fucking years. I've still got the spots on my reel though! I'll send him a card at Christmas.

Joker said...

If you have a shitty client spawned from the marketing raspberry hole of mediocrity, feel free to attach a focus group to your presentation. It's a waste of money and time, but with difficult clients, it actually does work from time to time. The other thing might be to offer some opium or a couple of pints to see if they'll loosen the hell up.

The whole focus group findings is based on one simple thing, if you speak to marketers in advertising language, they won't always follow and will simply think your a halfwit creative trying to win an award. If you speak to the monkey in its native tongue, you might get away with murder...

Also and very crucial... there's the pink rabbit move. This consists of making an advert exactly as you would want it and then include something you're piss sure they'll hate. They might actually focus on the shite last minute add-on and forget the rest of the ad. It sounds ludicrous, but trust me, I've seen it work and the only trick is to not laugh in their faces.